Greetings True Believers!

So the summer season was pretty dry this year… and it didn’t rain very much either. Ba dum tshh. Really though, most summer release schedules, as least in the gaming world, are slower than the fall and winter ones, so it was pretty much par for the course in 2010. There were a few major titles out, Metroid: The Other M probably being the most notable, but all in all just a regular slow summer. What that allows us, though, is a chance to follow the development of upcoming FALL releases. We await our main event pugilists with baited breath, neurotically hitting F5 as our salivation towels reach saturation. Well, not me of course. I just occasionally check the dev websites, because I’m really cool and I have things to do. Those sexy secret agent girls aren’t going to save themselves. The game I’m talking about, I’m sure you’ve guessed, is Halo: Reach. Well, you guessed wrong, (stupid)buddy. Not even I can get that one ahead of release date. No, the title I followed all summer like a giddy fanboy is Spider-Man: Shattered Dimensions. A game which promises, and delivers so hard on, just one thing: that you will swing around as four different Spider-men, listen to them say funny one-liners, and beat up so many bad guys you’ll make John McClane jealous. I guess that’s three things, but listen, you, don’t start telling me how to count… things.

Shattered Dimensions starts off with the titular Spider-Man facing off against Mysterio in a museum. In the ensuing brawl, an ancient relic is broken and scattered across four dimensions. The Spider-Men from each world must locate the various pieces of the relic, lest they fall into the wrong hands and spell certain doom for the world! The plot is SO rediculously comics it’s impossible to not find it charming. The whole game is complete fan-service. The visuals are pretty slick, with each Spider-Man travelling through worlds in their own setting, facing villains tailored to their theme. There’s the “Amazing Spider-Man” we all know and love, sporting a lighter, more cartoony feel. He’s also voiced by Neil Patrick Harris, which is awesome. Second is “Ultimate Spider-Man”, wearing that universe’s black suit, and with a more cel-shaded look, voiced by Josh Keaton from the recent Spectacular Spider-Man cartoon. There’s the rarely seen “Spider-Man 2099″ universe, which if full of so much neon I don’t even have a hyperbole for it, featuring Dan Gilvezan from the 80′s Spider-Man and His Amazing Friends. Finally we have a fairly recent variant, from 2008, with “Spider-Man: Noir”, whose world is grainy, sepia toned, and muted. He’s voiced by Christopher Daniel Barnes, from the 90′s Amazing Spider-Man cartoon, which is so awesomely unbelievably cool it’s awesomely unbelievable.
The combat system will feel very familiar if you’ve played any Spider-Man game in the last ten years. Web moves, punches, dodging etc. There’s nothing particularly new here. Amazing, Ultimate, and 2099 have fairly similar play styles, with some different movesets and strategies, but Noir is set up more like a stealth action game. It’s a good mix of designs that keeps it interesting. The bosses are fun and challenging, requiring varied strategies to defeat. The gameplay isn’t really innovative here, but it’s not really the point of the game either. The point is FOUR SPIDER-MANS.

Spider-Man: Shattered Dimensions is definately a good game. I loved it, but I realize I’m incredibly biased. I mean, I own four different Spider-Man shirts. Objectively, it’s got some groovy visuals, and tons of fanservice, but the gameplay isn’t all that original. Fanboyism aside, I’d say it’s a definite rental, probably only good enough to buy if you’re into the genre or Spidey in particular. At any rate, pick it up somehow, and enjoy. Right now. I mean it, go do it. Seriously, put down the paper, go to a video store somewhere, and get it. Why are you still reading? Don’t make me get the whip.

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